Dibs All-Time QB

There’s a glaring fact facing many NFL fans going into this weekends contests. Unless you are a fan of the Packers, Cowboys, Colts, Steelers, or Patriots, your quarterback has a history of being shaky at best. No this is not yet another column talking about how great Farve, Bromo, Elder Manning, Big Ben, and GQ Cover-boy . It is instead a look at this weekends NFL match-ups for those of us who are less fortunate as fans.


In Thursday night’s Epic Denver vs. Houston match-up Jay Cutler looks ready to go, but Matt Schaub is listed as questionable and did not practice at all this week. Schaub has been nursing a sore left shoulder for a few weeks now and missed last weeks game against the Bucs. As far as I have seen he is still listed as the probable starter but it will be a game time decision and Sage Rosenfels will be ready at the drop of a clip-board. Who would have thought that we would be discussing the merits of Sage Rosenfels for a 6-7 Texans team at this point.

In the Bengals vs. Niners game the Niners are starting Shaun Hill (181 yds and 1 TD replacing Dilfer last week). This is the 3rd starter the Niners have thrown out there with Alex Smith and Dilfer now on the shelf. Carson Palmer will be ready to go for the Bungles. Remember when these two prolific teams met in Super Bowl XVI and XXIII, quite a difference a couple decades makes I suppose.


Young Brodie Croyle is listed as probable and should be starting for the Chiefs. Former starter Damon Huard is listed as questionable. They face off against probable starter Vince Young and his sore ribs this Sunday.

The Fins quest for all-time futility this week will have competent-ish Cleo Lemon at the helm with 26 year old Rookie John Beck on the sideline after a dismal performance and very early exit last week against Buffalo. The Ravens will have Kyle Boller ready to go and 2006 Heisman winner Troy Smith paying close attention as he finally saw some PT against the Colts going 3 for 5 with a rushing TD.


Tom Brady is starting for the Patriots vs. the Jets. That is all. Any combination of the Jets three-headed monster of Pennington, Tuiasosopo, and Kellen Clemmons doesn’t really matter.

One of 2007’s biggest surprises is Cleveland’s Derek Anderson. The 2008 Free Agent had been building his future bank account with each multiple TD game (he has 9). Rookie Quinn sits patiently on the sidelines waiting for the off-season to demand a trade. He knew Charlie Frye wouldn’t last all season, but this whole Derek Anderson thing was a major curveball. D.A. will be slinging this week opposite of Buffalo’s Trent Edwards who took over for J.P. Losman a couple weeks ago.


Matt Hasselbeck looks like the most likely starter for Seattle this week things aren’t so clear for Carolina who has had 4 different starters this season. Among them a Heisman Trophy winner (Testaverde), a #1 overall pick (3rd stringer David Carr), and a pair of undrafted talents in Jake Delhomme (IR) and Matt Moore. The real question isn’t who’s starting this weekend, it’s does it matter?

The N.O. Saints will be home after their Monday Night win against Futile Atlanta and Drew Brees will continue being, well, Drew Brees. Meanwhile Bowtie Bill’s troops will most likely trot out the gloved senior citizen, Kurt Warner, who’s listed as probable, with local product Tim Rattay capable of taking over and the lesser Hasselbeck sending in signs. And 2nd year pro Leinart has been sent to the shelf to recoup the rest of the season. Once again it really doesn’t matter because the Cardinals excellent receiving corps is questionable, and now consists of players whose names none of you have heard. Seriously, it will be Brian (I think that’s his first name) Johnson and… well I could do the research and put them up here, but how is that different from me just saying the receivers will be Novak and Celinski the famed Polish 1-2 punch?


The Bucs look to be starting Jeff Garcia, but after the stunt that Chucky pulled last week who can trust his injury report. And the Falcons will be trying out a new offense where they punt on first down and hope for a muff because when your hopes and dreams ride on Joey Harrington (emergency 3rd QB) and the debate rages between Chris Redman and Byron Leftwich it really doesn’t matter. Also I recently found out Chris Redman plans an attempt at going to Arkansas with his former Louisville and Falcon coach Bobby Petrino. Also, Michael Vick is listed on the ESPN.com Falcons injury report. I guess they’re just assuming that Vick won’t be able to handle his fellow inmates with the same tenacity that he did helpless Pitbulls.

Farve starts for Green Bay to the surprise of no one and Marc Bulger’s status remains at questionable due to the lingering effects of a concussion. Gus Frerotte will remain out with the shoulder injury. Be ready for the Brock Berlin era Ram fans.


Roethlisberger will be facing off against the surprising David Garrard and the surprising Jaguars in one of this weeks only match-ups with day 1 starter vs. day 1 starter. Which of course means one of them will be injured on Sunday.

Peyton Manning and the Harrison-less Mannings take on the Raiders in an exhibition game this Sunday. Culpepper is questionable and has not practiced this week, Josh McCown is probable to play and to start, but then again he’s Josh McCown. JaMarcus Russell could possibly see some action in his continued attempt at the Rookie of the year (4 completions, 1 Appearance) and Scum Devil Andrew Walter is still technically on the team. He saw his first action of the season last week against Green Bay as well. Walter who was the starter going into the season has played in just one game, last week.


Jon Kitna will be starting for the Lions this week furthering his quest for that guaranteed Ten…errr…. Nine win season. Maybe the miracle worker can help out old Philip Rivers who is questionable and hasn’t practiced due to a knee injury. I honestly don’t know who will start at QB for the bolts. Back-up Billy Volek the touted former Titan has the most pass attempts of the Chargers back-up QBS (with 2) but LdT has the most completions and TDs with 1 of each. But if Tomlinson starts at QB who will the Bolts put in the backfield. So many questions.

Bromo leads the Boys onto the gridiron this week and will most likely be facing off against embattled starter Donovan McNabb (Future Bear?) in one of the few match-ups as mentioned earlier with week-1 starter vs. week 1 starter.


Sunday Nights game will have Todd Collins vs. Young Manning. Collins, impressive in a win over the Bears last Thursday, saw his first real action since going 1 – for – 4 in week 15 of 2004. Since then he took a few knees in 2005 and held a clip board all of last season. Giants fans still waiting to see which Eli they get. And since the good vs. bad has been done (see Rex Grossman) I think it appropriate to label the bipolar Manning’s performances as “Peyton” Eli or “Cooper” Eli, let me know if that’s just a little too mean.

And in the Monday Night Match-up the Chicago Lottery Picks, led by former starter and until recently Emergency QB Kyle Orton take on most likely Tavaris Jackson. This Viking team has had 7 different players record a pass attempt. When Tavaris Jackson is your quarterback you must have fallen on some hard times, who was Minnesota’s starting QB going into week 1? Really? Tavaris Jackson was, well how bad are your quarterbacks that an undrafted QB from Alabama State is starting? Oh Brooks Bollinger AND Kelly Holcomb. Ok I guess it makes sense now, as does the fact that another local product, Bobby Wade, is the teams leading veteran receiver. How did this team win two games without Adrian Peterson.


I think if Willie Tuitama declared for the draft right now, he would potentially be a first rounder. Teams really…REALLY need some QB solutions. Unless of course your QB is Brady, Farve, Roethlisberger, Bromo, or Peyton.
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Random musings in between sales calls

...a few random thoughts:
Ohio State, do they really have a shot if they play LSU or even Oklahoma? Or are they going to make it in because of tough schedule (Illinois and Michigan still lying in wait) just to get trounced again and they start looking like the Buffalo Bills?

On a related thought, with the Tribe out again, in heartbeaking fashion, and if the Buckeyes go back and lose in the title game again, will that cause suicides throughout Columbus and other reaching parts of Ohio that mirror Heavens Gate? Will black Nike runner shoe sales skyrocket in Feb. after the game, and White PJs (too soon for a heaven's gate joke?)

Let's look at the last few weeks of college football, 5 of the top 10 lose, then 4 of the top 10 lose, then numbers 1 and 2 lose, it's like a cruel formula that's starting to add up, like the college football Gods were just finding a way to ruin college football pools across the country and in turn ruin gambling for a nation of young future gambling addicts.I can't get over it, 10...TEN...top 10 teams have lost to UNRANKED opponents this season, and 6...SIX...times it has been on their own field.

If you could pick one sports reporter/anchor/color guy/analyst etc to do the play by play of your life and capped off with highlights at the end of the night who would it be? I think Kenny Mayne would have to do my highlight real, as for the play by play does it get any better than Keith Jackson, just imagine, Schilders has something important to tell Domschke, she moves in WHOA NELLY she's pregnant, I did not see that coming. Or doing the play by play for one of our beirut games, Fighting through his own mistake of knocking a cup over we're in the 2nd overtime, this is a barnburner here tonight. I wouldn't mind them throwing it to John Clayton to debate my good and bad decisions along with any updated injuries, while just waiting to see if his head actually falls off one day, and then the eventual top 40 highlight show with Chris Rose and Spider Salley.

Is Brett Favre overrated, and I'm not just saying this as a Bears fan, yeah he's the all time touchdowns leader (it took him longer than Marino) but he's also the all time INT leader (and it took him less throws than Blanda), he's in his 78th season and he still throws passes like that one to Urlacher a couple weeks ago, he makes TERRIBLE decisions. And he really needs to retire, I think he's the Emmit Smith of QBs, good but not as great as everyone thinks. Just wait until he's in Arizona, mark my words they went after Montana 12 years ago before he went to KC, they have Warner, and we can't forget Emmit Smith. The Cardinals, really do have the greatest front office, they want the stars but can't afford them, until they're too washed up to play anywhere else then Bowtie Bill (Bidwell) opens the door to overpay them. It's amazing. I heard Howie Long just signed a three year deal in AZ to make a comeback.

Why are my teams always in contention for the overhyped, extremely overpaid players, ARod constantly in Cubs talk, Kobe again re-entering into possible Bulls Uni, Why break up Deng, Gordon, Tryus or whatever ridiculous combination it would take to make this deal, I'll eat crow if he comes and we win a title but didn't we all see how much of a team player he is and the Bulls are the quintessential team. And ARod is a little more understandable, we'd only be getting rid of a lot of money not players, but didn't we struggle enough in October as it is, why not go after a guy who gets better in October, the only benefit to this is seeing a Cub shatter Bonds' *h*o*m*e* r*u*n* r*e*c*o*r*d*

Every week we're getting closer to hearing "and with the 7th pick in the 2008 NFL Draft the Chicago Bears select Brian Brohm, in another QB failure to add to the list, or Darren McFadden, to continue with a longstanding tradition of Heisman winning or finalist running backs or quarter backs to have their career start and end in Chicago, Darren have you met Rashaan Salaam and Curtis Enis yet? Or Brian let me introduce you to Cade McNown and Rex Grossman. They sell programs across the street. I think they'll have an opening in 4 years.

Is it too much to ask to be this guy in 30 years http://sports.espn.go.com/ncf/news/story?id=3062376

Is this what it feels like to be Bill Simmons getting paid while just writing thoughts on sports and life? Of course I'm not getting paid by ESPN, my musings really aren't that insightful or funny, and no one else is reading it, but still, yeah not really that close, just wait till I do a running diary, that'll show em.

Is it March yet?
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