Monday, May 5, 2008

John Bale = Nuke LaLoosh

Royals Pitcher John Bale must have been too focused on his pitching in the late 80s to catch a little gem known as Bull Durham. Unfortunately for him, he missed out on some key teachings from the Minor League Home Run King, Crash Davis. The first time Crash met young Ebby Calvin "Nuke" LaLoosh a.k.a. Meat, Davis taught him a very valuable lesson for a pitcher.

Scene: Dark Alley. Two Men bust through the back door, one a brash, drunk, young rookie in a hawaiian shirt coming off an incredible opening loss in the Carolina Leagues. The other an aged wise man who follows him to the alley. One Tequila the other Bourbon. A Fight ensues, and the brash rookie punches the wiser older guy, with his pitching hand. Something, that we find out, is the last thing a pitcher should do.

Flash Forward a few weeks, Crash has taught Meat plenty about the game, "sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, and sometimes it rains" and this time Crash is drunk (on Jim Beam Bourbon) and the Rook has good news for him. This time Crash picks the fight and Nuke gives him a solid hook. Crash's first response, "which hand'd you use?" Nuke used his non pitching hand. He learned in the Carolina Leagues.

It's simple, Mr. Bale. You make your living, using your hand. Your PITCHING hand. So why am I reading this story about a 5th year player on his 4th team who has appeared in 56 total games in his career and is in the rotation after a couple years in Japan, and is coming off the DL from a tight shoulder. You're in the show, you get to hit, or pitch rather, bright white balls at practice, someone is carrying your luggage for you. This could be your last cup of coffee before you head back down to the Carolina leagues. So why are you punching hotel walls with your PITCHING hand?

Are you kidding me? While you're on the DL, go rent Bull Durham. Listen to words of the wise Crash Davis.

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