Monday, July 14, 2008

Destroying a franchise; A how to

Ahhhh Yes, the stupidity of a rich man who finally bought himself exactly what he wanted, The NBA team Seattle couldn't or wouldn't pay to keep. Now Clay Bennett has his toy, an NBA franchise, and what do you do when you get a neat new toy...Well according to the announcers of the Bulls vs. Heat summer league game you give it a retarded new name. It would seem, at least for the moment, that the name being considered is the OK-City Thunder-Cats. Yes boys and girls like the awesome 80's cartoon. This has us at TheBearDown thinking, could there be 10 worse decisions for building a franchise then this?

10. Hire Brian McNamee to be the teams strength and conditioning coach. He did wonders for Andy Petitt and Roger Clemens all ready.

9. Hire Isaiah Thomas as the General Manager. He couldn't mess this up that badly, could he?

8. Give Jose Canseco a chance to run the promotions for each game. This guy could squeeze a nickel out of the most mediocre talent levels.

7. Have Latrell Sprewell handle the community relations department. I have heard he is a very hands on kind of guy.

6. Allow Kobe to handle all hotel accommodation's. The hotel staffs rave about his generosity.

5. Tab Kenny Rogers for Media Relations. This guy loses himself in his work.

4. Allow Hector "Macho" Camacho to design the team uniforms.

3. Ask the 1989 Minnesota Vikings Front office for help in draft strategy and trade away 3 1st, 2nd, and 3rd round picks for one player.

2. Hire a former TV Color Commentator with no experience to be your GM. Then after 16 wins in 4 seasons, give him a 5 year extension.

1. Try to Drum up fans and hold a Ten Cent Beer Night Promotion. Sit back and watch the hillarity ensue (Cleveland forfeited the game after fans rioted and charged the field, not in the fun Huge Upset College Football kinda way). Even though, I would be more than happy to attend Ten Cent Beer Night.


Mark said...

LMAO! Saw this on rootzoo, good stuff man. As a New Yorker, I appreciate Thomas getting it. Also love the Latrell one. Thanks.